Monday, February 26, 2007

Training Week 2 – 17 Weeks to Grandma’s

Monday, February 19 – 30 minutes elliptical and 30 minutes of strength training

Tuesday, February 20 – 9 mile Genaral aerobic run with 10 x 100 strides. Started strides around 6 miles, they were OK but not great…the ITB or hamstring is still tight and made it hard to really push the speed. At least it is warming up. I also did 45 minutes of elliptical training at lunch. 1:22:28 (9:10 pace)

Wednesday, February 21 – Did 5 miles around the island. Legs were feeling tired, but it was such a nice day I needed to get out. Would’ve liked to have done 6 since I skipped strength, but you do what you can.

Thursday, February 22 – Did 4 miles around the island at work and then 20 minutes strength. Had plan for another 6-8 after work but it didn’t happen.Friday, February 23 – Didn’t feel like doing anything at lunch and then ended up out of the office late and I just went home and vegged. Might have needed it.

Saturday, February 24 – Easy 7 miler. 5 was on the plan but being a few miles short already this week, I just did the extra cause it was feeling OK having rested on Friday. Pace was 9:15, which isn’t bad considering the fact that it was snowing and the traction wasn’t great. Legs actually didn’t feel dead, but ITB still tight as I used the roller after the run and it was sore.

Sunday, February 25 – Nothing – had friends at my place till 4:30 and with the storm, just didn’t feel up to going outside…

Mileage – 25
Strength – 2 sessions of 30 minutes
Elliptical – 1 sessions, 1 30 and 1 45

Definitely not a good second week, but I’m hoping this will help as I’ve just been feeling so tired and run down lately, maybe the rest is what I did need.

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Another Interesting Weekend

I finally got to get caught up with “my person.” (If you don’t watch Grey’s, or if you’re like FullMetalLunchbox and haven’t watched it cause it induces eating, let’s just say I mean she’s the one I’d call to help me drag the body across the living room after I killed someone) At least a little bit. It’s been forever since we caught up. In fact it was October last that her and I managed to get out and do something. She travels for work and just ends up being hard to get together for various reasons (even though she lives only about 10 minutes from me now) and she knows nothing of the C saga, and it was another friend’s birthday (well his birthday is on Wednesday but she’s out of town so we went out to see him last night, the picture was just before we left and Kerry thought it'd be fun to give him his birthday spankings)…a few cocktails and I asked where C might be as he wasn’t out, it was suggested I call him, so I did…umm…yeah…I know…Get him on the phone and he’s stuck in someplace in South Minneapolis as he has to give a guy a ride home to a place north then he is going to try to get back to us…about 20 minutes later he walks in (I have just finally started telling Kerry the C story). He found someone else to give the guy a ride and joined us right away. It’s getting late and Kerry is calling a cab to get us back to her place and C offers to give us a ride, he has had one beer so is fine…so off we go. Again, I realize. Anyway, first our friend is given his birthday spankings, then we headed out the door. C came in and we hung out at Kerry’s for a bit, then C took off, but not before we had a little talk…he can’t guarantee that I am not a rebound, and I realize that, at least he’s honest about that part. And to be honest, I know I’m going to get hurt if I keep my interest level and allow what I want to happen, to happen, namely things moving toward another level. I know that I am rebound girl, he can’t say if I am or not, but I honestly know that I am…and even knowing this, I am still drawn for some reason to him…so I guess I just take the leap and will be crying to you all in another month or two. I mean it’s not like we had a discussion and are “dating” now or anything like that. He just knows where I stand, and how I feel…he didn’t give me any reassurances and I still feel just as up in the air about it, but what do you do? Can’t always make ourselves interested in the right people now can we?? I always find the ones with the most baggage and somehow let them slip in. It’s kind of unfair, but what do you do. And this after my recent post about being single. This is why single is better in my mind!

So little sleep last night and I got up, went home and went for a 7 mile run. I ended up doing nothing yesterday cause I was just tired feeling and ended up working later than planned. This morning didn’t feel too bad though. It was a slow pace due to weather (about 9:10), in fact I ran into another person and we discussed the treacherous footing, tomorrow will be even worse, but running in something that is like loose sand has to do something good for you right? I guess that pace isn’t THAT slow considering, and it did feel better, nicer conditions might have brought some paces I was finally happy with. It’s just funny cause yes, I live in MN, shouldn’t we be used to this? But not really, we are more about the cold, not so much the snow, not for a long time and we are looking at getting another 6-10 inches tonight I guess. This is a picture after the snow had been coming down for an hour or so two maybe. It wasn't going to stop me from joining some friends to watch a band play though…and there are some attractive men in it, hmm…maybe I can use someone there to get myself over C!! Ah, fat chance but a nice thought.

Well, blogger was having issues, so I might as well round out the weekend. Even with the massive amounts of snow, I met up with friends and we went to see the band play. It was a fun night that continued into the wee hours. Even though I live kind of far from where they played, I invited everyone back for an afterbar. The drummer accepted as did the brother of one of the other members and the two people I went with and one other friend that joined us. We watched Eurotrip and hung out and suddenly sun was coming up and sleep was much needed. Woke up around 10:30 and everyone else (people had crashed here) woke up around 11. The boys left and the girls remained, we chatted till about 4:30, when they left and I am now so sleepy I’ll probably go to bed early. I did not get my run in today. Even if no one had been here, I don’t know that it would’ve happened anyway. We got at least 8 inches of snow and the sidewalks weren’t looking cleared. The picture shows my balcony at the end. Most of the main roads are clear, but the idea of running through all that snow was not overly appealing. It was a really bad week running and workoutwise, but oh well. I’ve been feeling run down, maybe I’ve been overtraining and hopefully this lighter week will lead to a better week this week. Also it’s the last drinking night for a really long time. I don’t normally drink both nights and this was a strange weekend. I’m dehydrated and body is exhausted. But that’s OK, once in a while you need to do that right? Besides, with the boy stuff going on, I really do need to get out of my own head once in a while!!

Friday, February 23, 2007

Appreciation at Work

I guess sometimes they pay attention...

I got these on Tuesday. The Dock at work called saying I had flowers…OK…why? It's not my birthday, it's not any holiday, can't think of anyone that would send me any (although my first thought, of course, jumped to the idea that a certain boy might have sent me some, but the only boy I would’ve wanted to have send them I don’t think even knows where I work and the idea of him sending me flowers when there is nothing going on between us is a laugh, at least nothing that would make him think to send me flowers)…then I had a second message that my co-worker also had flowers…hmm…We had been working on project from hell for the last two weeks, I was guessing that is what they were for, and yes, that is what we got them for. They are very pretty and I instantly thought spring when I got them. I would’ve posted about them sooner, but kept forgetting to bring my camera in and I wanted to include a picture of them. They smell very springlike…

We are also being taken out to lunch next week for an extra thank you. Now don’t get me wrong, I definitely love the fact that we are being appreciated (particularly after I was semi ignored on a lot of what I do last September at our legal retreat, which I still haven’t blogged about), but to be honest, it’s part of my job…falls under “special projects” and instead of receiving flowers (pretty as they are) and a lunch, I’d much rather be remembered with a good review and raise…I deal with cost of living stuff as part of my once a year project. We increase fees on some of our clients based on what the government puts out as the cost of living. This year it’s 3.5%...I know I won’t get that for a raise. Last year the cost of living was 2.3% and I got just under 3% for a raise, which while not a lot, actually made me happy as it was at least above cost of living, but still isn’t great…anyway, I’d still like a much bigger raise (wouldn’t we all) and honestly with my background and experience level I should actually have more, but this is the nature of the work I am in. I need to find something else as I really would like to, and should be making more…heck, I’m making less now than when I graduated college and started a job…

In other news. Yesterday I was scheduled for a 10 mile general aerobic run. I went for 4 miles at lunch, at a slow pace (didn’t wear a watch again) and 20 minutes of strength training. I felt drained yet again and that’s all I could do. Plus another few loops around the island would’ve made me loopy (that’s where I was running, today I’m venturing off campus again). I was going to run last night then when I got home, but instead I sat down and was drained so instead I watched Grey’s Anatomy and ate way too many graham crackers with frosting to put me way over my calorie limit for the day…sigh…and the scale showed it this morning…double sigh…Today will try to be better. At least it doesn’t look like I’m going out for pizza tonight as previously thought (friend doesn’t want to go out on the roads tonight since there is potential for snow). I can eat less then and, since I am driving and there will be snow, I won’t be drinking…again, fewer calories!! I’m going to run at lunch and maybe a second run after work today (I’m running 6-7 at lunch and then might do a 4-5 after work, kind of make up that 10 miler from yesterday, today is scheduled as a rest day, but I had plans to do the 10 yesterday and 4 today anyway). We’ll see how I feel. Regardless I’ll still have my planned mileage for the week, just cutting it back a bit to try to let my body recover and rest. I just can’t take a rest day though. It just makes me feel fat and guilty!

Thursday, February 22, 2007

Great Website

I just wanted to blog this so I won’t lose it and share with others. On a fluke after eating at California Pizza Kitchen last night and wanting to know the calorie count (well, not really but I decided to check) on the pizza I ate (it was Lent, I only had boring cheese, but it was with the honey wheat crust which is excellent and has to be a healthier option to the regular crust right??) and I stumbled across this site:


They don’t have health information for CPK, BUT they do have it for a lot of other restaurants and I found it to be quite interesting after trying to find some information for what I had had at Old Chicago on Sunday night. I don’t eat out often (although that may seem surprising since I’ve eaten out already twice this week and have plans to have pizza at a favorite local place on Friday night and am meeting a friend on Saturday, although honestly if I eat then, it will most likely be Subway or something) so this is a fluke week. I almost never go out, I prefer to make it myself and save the money and calories for other things!! But I’m weird that way. Eating out at restaurants has just become such an ordeal with serving sizes and all that. I’ve never been a big fan of leftovers, some things are fine, but most are not, so I’d much rather have half the portion they want to give me and pay a little less, but that isn't an option at most places. Even with the obesity epidemic they seem to still go over the top, Uno Pizza boasts a 10 oz hamburer...umm...1/3 pound is usually more than enough for me, and for my size, 6 ounces of meat a day is the max I need…not to mention the food is usually made with lots of butter and oil and other things to make it bad for you when I know I can make it at home with half the calories and fat and it tastes just as good!!

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Springlike Weather

It’s finally getting nice around here!! Last night when I ran my 9 miles, it was 40 degrees…this made for some difficulty as I don’t know how to do anything but put on every item that I own and head out for a slow cold run! I ended up in a 3 season top and my Illuminite Shell (very light weight and wanted it for the visibility since by the end it would be dark) and heavy tights and lined windbreakers…I could’ve skipped the heavy tights and been fine. I did keep gloves and hat on the whole time. Unfortunately even with the nice weather, the run was sluggish. I managed a 9:10 pace for 9 miles, with 10 x 100 strides, which were OK. I did them later in the run, started around mile 6, but they weren’t feeling great. My hamstring and IT band still feel kind of tight and it was pulling on the run. It was nice to not be wearing 6 extra pounds though and watching the snow melt and feeling like spring might be on the way is nice. I got home and stretched and used my foam roller. The ITB was screaming from it but things felt better after. Hurt enough to make my foot shake a bit as I held the position over the sorest spots.

Today I went for a 5 miler at lunch since I’m meeting a friend for dinner and shopping after work. I skipped the strength training today as I just didn’t feel up to it and will do it tomorrow instead. My leg was again feeling very tight on the run and I know it was a slow one, but the weather was awesome. Sunny and 43 or so when I started. I was slightly overdressed again, this time light tights and heavier pants, a 3 season top and windbreaker, but the windbreaker has zip off sleeves so I took the sleeve off and was fine. In fact I was gloveless after about a mile too. This was meant to be a recovery run, so I went watchless as well and just enjoyed the sun and warmth…now it’s still not 100% up to where I find it warm (my preferred temps are 65-75, yes, even for a marathon distance! I have very low cold tolerance and very high warm tolerance!!) but it’s so nice to be out of all the layers I’ve been in.

I’m still feeling a bit run down and sluggish though. I know it was suggested by a friend that I need more rest/sleep…well, last night I was asleep by 9, up at 10:30 and again at 3:30 to use the bathroom but I slept well other than that. Granted I was lower on sleep Sunday and Monday which probably accounted for the sluggish run last night. We’ll see what happens tomorrow. I have 10 miles general aerobic on the schedule but I think I’m going to run 4 at lunch and do 8 after work and give myself a little more time and energy to get some stuff done. I know it can’t fully be that I’m not eating enough, as granted I am still trying to cut calories and get down 4 more pounds for race weight, but I seem to be eating more than enough as I am always in the 2200 or so calorie range. The biggest problem is probably that it’s not necessarily “quality” calories all the time in there…I like too much crap. Need to work more on cutting that out I think.

Anyway, enough for now. I meant to bring my camera in today so I could post a picture of something, will try to remember tomorrow!

Monday, February 19, 2007

Training Week 1 – 18 Weeks to Grandma’s

Monday, February 12 – 30 minutes strength, 30 minutes elliptical had to work at 11 so no run

Tuesday, February 13 – 45 minute elliptical at lunch. 9 mile run after work with 10 x 100 strides. Strides weren’t working real well as my hamstring was a bit sore and it was cool enough that my muscles just weren’t warm enough to really push it without chance for injury so I kept it at a moderate pace. 1:22:00 (9:07 pace)

Wednesday, February 14 – 30 minutes strength, 30 minutes elliptical then a run after work for 5 miles. Garmin was having issues so I didn’t wear it, was just an easy run anyway.

Thursday, February 15 – 8 mile run at lunch around work. No Garmin because it was cold and I didn’t want to wait for it to get the signal.

Friday, February 16 – 30 minutes strength, skipped the elliptical due to having too much work stuff to do. Was too tired after work to make an attempt at a run and according to the schedule it is a rest/crosstraining day, but I felt guilty not doing more.

Saturday, February 17 – Easy 5 miler planned, ended up doing 7 because it was finally a bit warmer and my paces were nice. 1:01:30 (8:47 pace)

Sunday, February 18 – 18 mile long run. I managed to negative split the second 9 which felt good and I ran a bit faster than I should’ve on a few of the miles but overall my paces were close to where they should be. I got some bad chafing for lack of using body glide, I know, dumb but I seem to just not think of it in the winter for whatever reason. I also had a tweak feeling of some sort in my left knee at about mile 12 of the run. It hurt for a bit, but not long and nothing that felt serious. End of the run I was feeling some soreness so I iced and then later figured out the icing wasn’t in the right place. I iced around the knee on the inside as that is where I was slightly sore most recently, when I later was probing it to find the pain it seems the main area it hurts is around the patella (thanks RW for having a great breakdown of the knee in the March issue!!), mainly a bruised feeling. I have today as cross training so will rest it and ice after work, before B&N.

Mileage – 47
Strength – 3 sessions of 30 minutes
Elliptical 3 sessions, 2 30 and 1 45

Not a bad first week. Mileage is there, I really need to now focus on the quality of the speed sessions that will be incorporated from here on out and figure out the best way to get them in. Thankfully the weather is warming up a bit.

Sunday, February 18, 2007

Sunday 18 Miler

First 18 miler of this training session done. I know yesterday I was being wishy washy and said 16-18 miles, all along my plan had 18 miles on it, I just wasn’t 100% sure if I was going to feel up to 18 miles…thankfully I was.

Mile 1 – 9:36
Mile 2 – 9:32
Mile 3 – 9:18
Mile 4 – 9:35
Mile 5 – 9:26
Mile 6 – 9:25
Mile 7 – 9:27
Mile 8 – 9:16
Mile 9 – 9:01
Mile 10 – 8:32
Mile 11 – 8:57
Mile 12 – 8:47
Mile 13 – 8:47
Mile 14 – 8:42
Mile 15 – 8:36
Mile 16 – 8:40
Mile 17 – 8:37
Mile 18 – 8:34

OK, not the most consistent, BUT following the negative splits pattern that I’m supposed to be. MP + 20% first half, MP + 10% second half. Unfortunately I picked up the pace a little too much in Mile 10 and it was a little under on Mile 11 but the rest was good and I even picked up a bit more at the end. I really thought a few of those miles toward the end were slowing down, they felt slower, but I did manage it. Time was 2:42:57 for an overall pace of 9:03…not too bad. When I hit the end of my run, coming into my association there was a car sitting, waiting to turn out, the driver had her window down and as I turned and was running down the driveway to finish out my run (I was at 17.87 miles at that point) and the woman was yelling out her window trying to get my attention. I’m sure it was to ask directions or something…I don’t get people. Do you not see me running, focused?? I’m not out for a walk…I’m training, and when I’m training, I don’t stop to offer directions, to chat with people, to visit or anything like that…fine when I’m done with the run but don’t bother me when I’m in the middle or worse yet, almost at the end. If that makes me a bitch, so be it!!

Oh, and things I learned, one good thing about the cold and snow, it makes a really nice fridge to keep your water cold and get your Powerade, that is warm cause you failed to put some in the firdge, cold by the time you get to it 55 minutes later!!

I’ll have to post my first week of training tomorrow as I don’t have all the stats with me right now.

Time to rest a bit, I’m meeting MNFirefly a little later for dinner and a beer.

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Better Weather = Better Running

Finally…an OK run…at OK paces!! This was just an easy run, keep things loose, in prep for my long run tomorrow. It was set to be 5 miles, but I did 7 as it felt fine. It’s finally warming up a bit and by later this week it might actually be in the 30s (it was mid 20s for a high today). It was a bit windy, but not terrible. I had a bit of a rough night last night, so it actually surprised me that I was able to run OK…might have to write up a second post about that…but I did the 7 miles, averaging 8:47. This is the best run, pacewise, that I’ve had since winter really set in. Being able to run with fewer clothes might have helped!!

Mile 1 – 8:38
Mile 2 – 9:07
Mile 3 – 8:43
Mile 4 – 8:52
Mile 5 – 8:48
Mile 6 – 8:23
Mile 7 – 8:49

Up tomorrow, 16-18 miles…

Friday, February 16, 2007

Thursday Recap and Friday Night...

Ok, I know what I really need to do. Stop complaining and just quit…but it’s not quite that easy as the little bit I do make actually is used toward a couple of expenses that were unexpected in the last year and I’m trying to get paid off and a little bit of “fun” money…my budget is just too tight right now…then there is the brief thought I’ve had of buying a house and the fact that I’ve been at B&N for over 2 years and the income provides something would be a plus in approval on a mortgage, but it so just doesn’t seem worth it. For one thing I thought I was working 6-11 last night, bad enough as it’s just late when I have a million things I have to be focused on right now at my day job, and then get there to find that I was wrong, I actually worked 6:30-11:30, so almost midnight before I got to bed and then I was up hitting snooze till 6 before trying to get to work at 7, I was here just after…Anyway, annoyance from last night and please, tell me if anyone sees anything wrong with this picture and/or phrasing (remember, I work part-time, 10 hours a week, that’s 2 5 hour shifts a week and no more unless absolutely necessary!)…I need March 9-18 off. I might be going to my parents during part of that time, I have friends coming into town, there’s, of course, St. Patrick’s day (and I worked the darn thing last year, this year I am going out wearing my clover lei and shamrock glasses damnit!) etc…so I told the store manager (there are 3 of the managers we can have write down that we need off on the calendar and she was the one available, and this is almost a month away that I need this time) that I needed those dates off. She right away says, the 10th isn’t going to work, we have too many already off that day (I think there is some event of some sort that day as there were only 4 written down for off that I could see), and I said well, I’m going out of town…she asks when I work again, and I said Monday, she tells me she’ll put it down with a question mark that Lynn will have to take a look and decide…umm…still going out of town (probably, might go that Friday night and come back yet on Saturday, just figuring that out), then she actually tells me “well, next time talk to us before you make plans to leave town”…ummm…yeah, I’m part time. So, that’s when I threw out the bomb “my mom is turning 60…and my dad is retiring” she says, “oh, well, guess that can’t be controlled.” Hmm…you think. OK, technically my mom’s birthday is the 16th, but I was going to go home at least part of the weekend before cause a friend is in town the next weekend and I haven’t seen him in a couple of years. I’m pretty sure I will be giving my notice on Monday when I go in. This will cover in case they try to schedule me the 10th. Even if I don’t give notice, I will not be working the 10th. I can guarantee that.

On a little better note, hell project is getting close to being done I hope. I’m tired from work last night, exhausted from the stress of the week, ready to kill all of my boss’, might have to blog on that at another time…let’s get this straight, I do like them usually, but right now it’s just too much!! But anyway, I did get an 8 miler in at lunch yesterday, and today I did 30 minutes of strength training and tried to convince myself the treadmill is my friend, but unfortunately it just wasn’t happening…I skipped elliptical too. I might go for a 3-4 miler tonight, AFTER I take a nap that is. The temps are warming up, I’ve watched it go from 9 to 11 to 13 and now it’s 16…it might hit the 20s they were predicting yet today. And next week a heat wave!! We are supposed to get into the 30s!! I won’t know how to dress for that.

Today on a debate with myself, but I think I’ve found the answer. I have a friend that wants to have people meet up for a happy hour, I’m just too darn tired. If I do the happy hour I pretty much have to be out for the evening, and that just doesn’t seem appealing. I need a little recovery and some down time before I head there, just because I’m so tired from no sleep last night. I could run there for a drink, go back home, attempt a quick nap and then get out for the evening, but that wastes an hour in the driving to the happy hour and back (30 minutes each way figuring parking and all that). I’m bummed cause it’s at a place I haven’t been in ages and I’d like to go, but I’m just so tired I don’t see it happening. I think instead I’ll head home, take a nap, go for a 3-4 mile run, have a little dinner, drink a daiquiri and then go to my regular place when my friend gets to my place around 9 (which I told her to do!). And she has very strict orders to keep me away from C...long, long story on that one and I'm still confused...maybe something will end up here on it, but I don't know that I want to bore everyone. Sounds so much less stressful though just starting from home later…I feel bad though as I’d like to talk to the friend at the happy hour anyway, as I haven’t seen him in a while…this would be J2…

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Work and V-day

I realized in my little recap of the run from yesterday I didn’t mention anything about B&N…so I went to work on Monday night and had my walking papers (2 week notice letter) all ready to go, did this a few times last fall in fact too, but didn’t turn it in. I kind of was waiting for something to push me to it, and one of the things, the passive aggressive behavior of one of the managers (instead of flat out saying I was doing “wrong” by chatting for a minute or two, so sue me, it was a slow night, to one of the regular customers that I haven’t chatted with in a while) coming and “asking me” if I could go straighten in another area of the store, well away from the café where I was chatting (only because I had been in there to pick up books that needed to be put away I might add, so it’s not like I just walked over there to talk to him). Tomorrow I work again, and you never know…I might end up quitting then. It’s all just a matter of time. I do thank those who responded and yes, the idea of another part-time job has been in my mind, but the thing is there aren’t many other retail places I would want to work, a running store is about it, and I don’t think they have very high turnover and/or very many employees. I know the one I talked to last fall was full and even then the part-timers work from 10-30 hours a month…so we’ll see. It was sounding like might not be till spring that they might be hiring.

More work frustrations today too. I like my boss, he’s a nice guy, but he’s down in my office everyday right now wanting a status update on how things are with it, and then constant phone calls, even though I’ve been updating him end of the day, everyday, to let him know where things stand. Granted, he’s new, and this is a major project and we have a lot of pressure to have it all done/updates in by Friday, but all the phone calls, emails and stop bys don’t help…sigh…I might need to head out for a drink somewhere this evening…big problem is it’s February 14th, so one of the only nights that you can’t really go out, inconspicuously alone, and have a drink. Especially as a girl. The places that I wouldn’t mind running to for said drink, that are not far from home, are also probably not the best place to go alone…and unfortunately I don’t tend to go out during the week, and most of my friends are attached anyway, so really no one to go out with. I so hate this day. And no, not because I’m bitter single, but because it’s a day that recognizes the laziness and taking for granted that people do for each other. Why is it one day of the year should be taken to say I love you to those around you. Does an overpriced bouquet of red roses (and believe me guys, most women would much prefer a mixed bouquet of something that shows you have some imagination, sure have a red rose in it, but there are so many flowers and mixed bouquets are so pretty and most decent women don’t even care if they are from a nice flower shop, they can come from the grocery store or the farmer’s market, but the fact that you thought to buy them is the most important thing), maybe some expensive chocolates and possibly an expensive dinner one night of the year really make up for neglect the other 364 or 365 (in leap year!) days? Granted, it might be that everyday is love and that one day is extra romantic, but I don’t think that’s the reality…it also puts this extra pressure on. Hmm…I wonder if the approach of this holiday has anything to do with all the pressure I’ve suddenly been feeling that “I should be dating someone”…

Tuesday’s Workouts

I did a 45 minute elliptical training session during my lunch, just needed to get away from my desk due to some pushy people and e-mails that were starting to really tick me off…I could’ve smacked some people yesterday with their attitudes and things they were doing.

After work I had to run errands to the library and post office but then was out the door to run. Plan was 9 miles, which I did, with 10 x 100 meter strides. Well, the temps were 9 or so with some windchill effect in there as well. A bit chilly. I was 6 miles into the run when I attempted my first stride, down a slight incline, so it did help, but with the extra clothes and the fact that my left hamstring is making itself known, I didn’t push as hard as I could’ve on it, and I don’t know that I actually hit 100 meters either as I was making guesstimates on the distance since I can’t read my Garmin in the dark (and by 6 pm it was dark!). I managed the 10, but none of them were very fast and finished at somewhat over 8 miles which I wrapped up with an easy cool down to home. Time was 1:22 and some odd seconds and a 9:07 average pace. I’m getting tired of this being so tired by the end of runs though and the cold messing with my strides. I’m starting to wonder/question if these are doing me any good?

Anyway, suppose I should get to doing some work. The one good benefit of yesterday’s workout though is that I managed to drop the 2 pounds I seemed to have gained over the weekend again…9 miles and the elliptical at noon seem to go well for that!! Now to drop a bit more and manage to keep it all off!! Although that might be hard since I might treat myself to bad for me things tonight...wallow in self pity over having to deal with that most stupid of all holidays. Why can't we skip the Feb 14 one and go right to the March 17 one??

Monday, February 12, 2007

Should I Stay or Should I go?

I have to work tonight. Guess what? I don’t want to work tonight. In fact I never want to go to work at B&N again. I had an epiphany on Saturday night, but with all the blogging I did in my rant about singlehood and my update on my run I just didn’t get time to blog about my night and my epiphany…B&N is full of negative energy. It’s bringing me down and probably a huge reason why things have been off for me lately. Why people who don't obey the laws and let their dogs run without leashes bother me. And why, when normally I've been a huge dog lover, all the barking dogs on the yards annoy me. I'm taking in all this negative and I need to get it out, so my attitude sends it back out and prevents me from "not sweating the small stuff." Ever since the new year, when I made a decision to be more upbeat, happy and putting positive energy out there, it’s been harder and harder to be in that place. Customer’s are worse now than they ever have been. I don’t go a single shift without dealing with someone that is just out to cause problems and/or pick a fight (case in point last Wednesday when I was standing at the one computer at our info desk and a guy came to the counter, near the other computer and as far away from me as he could get, was diddling in his notebook, so apparently didn't have a question, then I heard him saying excuse me, kind of quietly and thought he was on his phone, I was watching for those that might need help, when I finally realized he was talking to me, so I looked at him and he finally walked over to where I was standing and at the same time complaining that he has “been trying to get my attention for at least 40 seconds”…umm, yeah, why don’t you come to where I am for help. Idiot, and he wasn’t one of the old crotchety ones either, come on people, if someone is standing at a computer, go to where they are, not the complete opposite side from them) and criticism from the managers. Seriously, for all that I get criticized (and no, it’s not just them picking on me, I know others hear it too) you’d think I should be fired from the place. Saturday night it was a “make sure you are doing recovery and not just standing there for an hour. There was a lot of recovery in kids when you were over there.” Umm, yeah, the manger had come into kids 10 minutes before I left and when just 5 minutes before suddenly a ton of people had come into the department, prior to that it had been quiet and I had put all things that were out away…can’t exactly put it away when customer’s are looking at it can I?? So basically for $8.25 an hour, 5 hours at a time, 2 shifts a week I get to be put down by customers, criticized by managers and made to feel even more low about myself than I do most other times. And in exchange I don’t get to go to bed when I feel like going to bed, I get to stand around instead of relaxing and/or getting runs and/or other workouts in. I find myself so drained from all the negative stuff that I can’t seem to find the energy that I need for my runs anymore…oh and dealing with crappy customers sends me to the café where I eat chocolate cupcakes, cinnamon rolls and on some occasions cheesecake that I don’t need, not when I’m trying to lose 6 more pounds!! (oh, and eating them later at night so I get sugar in my system and can’t get to sleep) I kind of made the decision in my mind on Saturday night though, that this is no longer worth it. Sure, I do technically kind of need the money, I have a few bills I’ve really been trying to pay down and without that income, it’s going to be even longer before they are paid off…but seriously, I don’t think it’s worth it anymore. So I guess I just don’t have any fun spending money anymore, I cancel all plans for vacations beyond my already booked one and save my sanity…and of course look for something else full time that pays more or hope and pray something opens up at one of the running stores and I can work there a few hours a month, and/or I find something else in the part-time arena to do.

I’m going to type up my notice and when I’m in tonight, we’ll see how it goes and if I give it or not. Am I brave enough to? I just don’t want to give up weekend time anymore for that place. But then again, if I'm home, I tend to snack, that isn't conducive to my weight loss, and if I'm not working, I don't really have money for going that's a Catch 22 isn't it, but then hey, I don't have money to have food in the house then either right? It's just so not worth it. I wish I could find a job just making a little bit more than I do right now…there’s still the roommate option too. Although I do so like living by myself so much better. It's a tough decision.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

24 Hours

What a difference such a short period of time can make. Two weeks ago, Friday January 26, I ran outside for 14 miles in close to 40 degree temps, by the next day we were in the single digits and/or below 0...and it hasn't warmed up since that time frame. 24 hours, heck, just a few hours time it took to get that cold, now 10 days later, finally a change has come. I went for a 16 mile run yesterday. I so had the days backward, but yesterday at noon I headed out in 2 degrees with -7 or so windchill, 2:27 minutes later and 8 pounds of clothing I made it back without frostbite and and OK feeling run. I was unable to make my goal of negative splits, but I started out too fast as it was:

Mile 1 – 9:03
Mile 2 – 8:47
Mile 3 – 9:03
Mile 4 – 9:07
Mile 5 – 9:33
Mile 6 – 9:02
Mile 7 – 9:02
Mile 8 – 9:10
Mile 9 – 9:09
Mile 10 – 8:49
Mile 11 – 9:06
Mile 12 – 9:09
Mile 13 – 9:23
Mile 14 – 9:30
Mile 15 –9:27
Mile 16 – 9:31

My goal is 9:30 pace for the first half, 8:50 pace for the second half, you can see where it was too fast to start, but oh well. I made it through. I did attempt a speed up, but it just was too hard with that 8 extra pounds I was carrying. The last couple of miles really hurt, but hey, I managed 16's the longest run I've done since Marine Corp.

Now today, I headed out for a run right around noon again, the temps at the start were about 16, no real windchill, and I managed to get by with just a light weight top, a slightly heavier top, a windbreaker, my tights, cold weather pants, socks, hat and glittens...I didn't even need the face's amazing how much better it can feel after running in such cold, just to get above 0...I only did 6 miles, at a 9:04 pace, and a short stop to yell at a dog (I'm so sick of the barking dogs in people's yards, there are barking ordinances and the dog just annoyed me, so I barked back at it...I was almost done with the run...I can be stupid sometimes!!)

Anyway, finished with 41 of the 43 miles I wanted to run this week, it was short on my two mid-week longer runs of 7 and 8 miles which were supposed to be 9 and 9, but that's just how it worked. I had a long work week and I did what I could. Officially tomorrow though, starts my 18 week training program for Grandma's. I still need to find sleeping arrangements...

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Single life...a bad thing?

Why is it no one can believe that if you are single, you can possibly be happy and OK with who you are and where you are at in your life? That dating isn’t a priority and you can enjoy the rest of your life without the problems that come with dating? It seems every time I go out, and every time I see friends (particularly a certain group of friends and most particularly guy friends) the conversation always turns to my “single” status. And when I say I don’t even want to date, no one can just accept that?? When I state my being sick of the so-called “dating scene” and that I’m just tired of all the crap. I’ve dated a lot. My last boyfriend and I broke up in June of 1998. No, that is not a typo. Since that time, I’ve been on countless dates, met countless men and not a single one of them led to anything in the way of a relationship of any significance. There was one in there I saw almost everyday for about a month, a few others that were a date or two, maybe a few that led to three or four dates, but nothing that led to anything serious. And no, I’m not typing this and putting this out there for pity. Granted, a year or two ago I was very unhappy about this, I felt like a failure, loser or what not over and over again. What was so wrong with me that guys didn’t want anything more from me than to sleep with me (and no, it hasn’t been the case, that I’ve slept with them all on the first date and that’s why they didn’t call back!), and apparently if that didn’t happen right away, I wasn’t worth trying a little harder to get it. Those that I “slipped up with” and maybe did something stupid too soon usually didn’t choose to call back either. A couple of years ago I was on a mission to figure out what was “wrong” with me…I mean the fact that there were so many dates with so many different guys, guys that I met in so many different ways, that I figured it couldn’t be them, it had to something with me. Of course most of them, after not calling after they said they would, were not easy to get a hold of. All I managed to get out of the one or two that I got in contact with was, was the fact that I was really asking the wrong ones (talk about issues, one, a guy a couple of years older than me told me I wasn’t “mysterious” enough). Plus, in my heart of hearts, I probably already knew most of the answers to my questions anyway. At least somewhere…

So a year and a half ago I decided I needed to take a 6 month break from anything romantic to do with men… that didn’t last that long as a few months into that time I did end up kissing someone, did that mean I needed to restart the 6 months? Anyway, last February or so it finally just all came to a head. I don’t know what or why, I had still been looking last January, I was talking to a guy on (and I still have been talking to him, but a year later we haven’t met in person yet and I really don’t care one way or the other if we do, because I just don’t feel excited about him), and hanging out with a guy I had had a previous interest in and had disappointed me, well, we finally had a talk and ended up deciding to give casual dating a bit of a try, and it was OK for a bit, but once I had what I wanted (namely a chance to date him) I realized I really didn’t want him that much anymore so that went by the wayside and since that time, I just haven’t even been trying. Now about a year later and honestly, I still feel the same way. I’m not a “man hater” or “anti-dating” or anything like that. I like the way things are, but if the absolute right man came along, and there weren’t issues and it was there, I would throw it out. I don’t think I’m damaged anymore, I don’t have issues, baggage and the like, maybe it’s that I’m tired of being a cynic? Maybe my experiences have helped shape the things that happen though too. Who knows? All I know is that I actually am happy with the way things are in my life. At least some things, job, sure, I need a change, but in the meantime it is getting me experience and getting me by till I figure out what it is I want, I own a house, I own my car (well, if I were to sell my house I would own it, I bought it with an equity loan). I’m fairly intelligent, I’m fit and I have my running. Although this might be a problem too! Last night I was being questioned by a friend yet again and this is where the post is coming from. I told him it had been almost 9 years since I had had a “boyfriend”…this got him. As it gets everyone…OK, so I am damaged, there is something wrong with that (especially since it hasn’t been that whole time that I didn’t want to date) but I’m fine with it. The conversation (last night but also no matter who I’m talking with) always goes toward “there are decent men out there” then questions of where I’m meeting people, etc…I’m not trying to meet people. This is the thing that people can’t seem to get their mind around, that they can’t understand that I’m not looking (cause inevitably I hear the, “that’s when you’ll find someone”). No, it’s not, it really isn’t something I want. I like being able to come and go as I please, not have someone else I have to “report” to. I like getting home and eating my half box of Lucky Charms for dinner if I want (yes, that was dinner again last night), or nothing at all, getting up early and running or sleeping in. Not leaving the house at all, or going and running all kinds of errands. Keeping things incredibly neat, or slightly messy if I want. It’s my life and I can do what I want without getting someone else involved. I can sleep across the whole bed, go out or stay in…no one else has a say. My friends that are attached and/or married, don’t see happier than me and most seem kind of on the miserable side, I know it doesn’t have to be that way, but it’s my point of reference that I see. What it comes down to is I’d rather be alone alone, than alone with someone…The friend last night I asked me what I like, trying to get suggestions in on where I could meet people…this is my life and my typical week, I work day job, maybe workout at lunch and workout again after work, I get home, eat dinner, veg a bit and go to sleep. I work two nights a week at B&N (usually one of the weekend) and on Friday nights I go to my local hang out and hang out with the friends there (this was one of those friends). He was suggesting me getting involved in running clubs, OK, granted, I did say that was a resolution of mine, but so far I just can’t seem to get motivated to do that as I just like running when I want, running how far I want and doing what I want…I NEED to train by myself. OK, so I’m independent…is that a bad thing? Anyway, my point here is that running is “my time” and maybe I do have too much me time, but I like that. I don’t like getting interrupted with it. I also told him that I did talk to and give a guy my number last week, honestly I thought J4 would call, but reality is he hasn’t, and while I was interested and would’ve gone out with him, I’m not upset either. The friend I was chatting with also suggested C, when his name came up with regards to something that’s a nice guy and is single…(as I said, everyone knows everyone in this group and C is one that is part of this group) well, I pointed out I highly doubted that C was looking for something considering he just finalized his divorce. Sure, he wants what any guy wants, but not much more than that and the point of all this is, I can get that if I want it…other problem is, I think I’m starting to develop feelings for C…even though he’s so NOT what I want…he’s older than my age range, he smokes, which is a huge, huge, huge turn off to me, he has a kid, (and since I’m pretty sure I don’t want kids of my own, not really wanting to take on someone else’s kids) and he got burned really, really bad by his ex and in the divorce…so of course I would develop a thing for him, he’s absolutely unhealthy…but at the same time he’s funny, smart, cute…but anyway, it cannot and won’t go beyond that!! It can’t…I don’t need the baggage and issues!!

Anyway, enough rambling, I just want people to stop getting on my case about this because it’s only after these discussions, that on occasion, I start to feel a little like I want to be with someone, like something might be wrong with me and this isn’t right. Is it because these people are all involved with someone, really not happy with it and want all others to be miserable like them just so they don’t have someone to be jealous of?

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Hectic Week

OK, been a very, very busy week and it’s just getting worse but I wanted to do a quick update and will try to do more over the weekend. I took Monday off of running because it was cold (not as cold as Sunday but I just didn’t want to get out in it after a day at work, I did cross train with the elliptical and strength at lunch that day). Tuesday I ran 7 of the 9 on my plan and I didn’t get the LT (Lactate Threshhold) run in that I wanted to. Mainly because we got snow again that day and it was slick out yet again. I was going to use a track (indoors) but this week is hell at work and a number of things that need to get done and I got out of the office late so didn’t have a chance to use indoors…oh well. I managed 45 on the elliptical that day at lunch along with the 7. Yesterday I did 4 at lunch instead of my strength (I had to work at B&N last night so I would’ve had no more time to run after work) and was going to get up early this morning and do strength instead and yeah, umm, that didn’t happen…sigh…I was in at 7 today, will most likely be here till 7 or 8 tonight trying to get things done that are suddenly being required by tomorrow (we were supposed to have till next week) but my plan is to take a longer run of 7-8 miles at lunch time, an extended lunch, and then back to my desk, so I’m breaking the day up a bit.

In other news, my trip for April is booked!! My mom turns 60 in March and my sister and I decided instead of throwing some big party or something, instead we would take her on a trip, a girls weekend thing. We threw out a number of ideas and Savannah, GA kind of stuck, over the weekend mom found a package deal that was not bad for 5 nights and flight times were good so we leave on April 14 and come back April 19. Hopefully the three of us won’t kill each other in that time frame!! Now to just figure out what we want to see. Our hotel even has running trails right out the door, or so the web site says…cause I’ll need to get my runs in that week. I’ll have to adjust my schedule though for that week.

Monday, February 05, 2007

5 Frozen Miles

OK, I tried to post this yesterday with the weather thing, but, unfortunately it didn't work for whatever reasons (my stupid internet connection I'm sure, I couldn't get the pic to work) but it was about -10 and windchill of about -20 when I left my house around 1:00 to go for a run. But I put on: a light pair of tights, a heavy pair of tights, windbreaker pants and my heavy winter running pants, wool socks, a light tech layer (long sleeved), a heavy, cold weather top, a cotton t-shirt, another hooded cold weather top and a windbreaker jacket, my balaclava, pulled up the hood and added a hat, magic mini gloves and my heavy duty mittens and I went out...actually wasn't that bad after I got away from the windiest part. I couldn't see much as most of my face was hidden, but that was OK. I didn't time it, just ran, I know it was slow. I got home and weighed myself, I had 7.2 pounds of clothes on wonder if felt slow!! I'm glad I managed it though.

Today the weather report stated we are now at 60 hours and counting of below zero temps. And today it isn't expected to get much above 0 if at will warm up a bit this week (getting into single digits tomorrow) but man, that's a long time of below zero!!

Saturday I did end up at the party. Met a friend for a beer one place and then we went to the party, was there till about 4:30 am...and I wasn't even drinking that much, was just having fun, had a few people I was talking with, one kind of seemed to want me to stay, we'll call him J3...(getting confused yet??) He never did ask for my number or anything though, and he lives a ways from here at this time, but I did e-mail the party host and tell him to pass on my number if he was asked for it, or if he felt it appropriate. We'll see if anything comes of it. Figured what was there to lose...After my run, a friend came over and we went to a nearby bar for a drink and to watch the game, well, I drank, and she encouraged me to have more since she was I had one last one, but thankfully had eaten enough that I wasn't anything but maybe slightly buzzed...I had had one beer purchased for me from a guy across the bar, he then did come over and we were all talking, his buddy came over as well and my friend was talking to him, although she didn't seem to have the luck I was, well, is it luck? I'm still not sure I want to date...Anyway, we'll call this one J4...OK, too many guys with the same first initial!! Anyway, J4 did suggest going for a happy hour or something, he seemed nice, smart, kind of cute...we'll see what happens. He told me I had a great personality and that I was very fun, I found that to be a very nice compliment...After the game I had been texting another friend and he came over to watch a movie when I got home...that's a long, complicated story in and of itself...sigh...Focus on running, that's all I can think about right now right??

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Arctic Blast

So last night I got a run in in single digits...this weekend is going to be all below 0. Normally last night, the night after my longer run, I would've just done an easy 4 recovery or so, but instead I extended it to 6 because I was feeling OK and the weather was OK. Managed 54:39 for 6, just over 9 minute miles, I guess that's acceptible. I may brave it today, but not 100% sure on that so if I don't, at least I managed something! I don' t know that I really want to leave the house, but I really do have a few errands I kind of want to run and I wouldn't mind going and using the elliptical trainer...I just know how cold it is, even though I haven't been out, because I did go out for a drink last night and met some friends and it was cold, but not horrible when I got there, but when we left at 2...ouch...the blast was awful. One of my friends that was leaving at the same time as me stopped and was wanting to carry on a conversation, the other two of us were very much, "Come on C, let's go, it's freezing" so we walked and tried to talk, both of them were very drunk though so it wasn't much of a conversation!! They suggested I should come with them as they had beer and movies, but having had only 3 beers in 4 hours I really just wanted to get home and into my own bed, instead of sharing a couch! I did stop at the grocery store on the way back too, but I didn't quite remember to buy everything I to the gym or not...

There in lies my it worth it? Not sure I'll manage to leave the house today, but I don't really want to stay in either. I actually don't work tonight or tomorrow. I have a party to go to tonight night, and I feel like I should go and it's not far from my house, and I haven't managed to go to this guys last 3 parties, so I really do want to go to this one. I guess I'll see!

Friday, February 02, 2007


Thank God…last night it wasn’t quite as cold as it’s going to be this weekend and there was a light snow coming down, I thought about going home and running, and then remembered that the main reason I wanted to run at the Dome was so I could see about my paces and figure out if I was really as slow as I’ve been feeling. So I drove downtown and actually made it there just before 5 and the running is from 5-8 so that worked out quite nice. I got changed was running at just after 5…the running is a bit off, as you are running around this large square/circle if that makes sense, rounded, but not terribly rounded and it’s hard to tell where you are in relation to where you started 1 lap on the outer wall is .64 miles around, middle is .62 and inner is .60, but the inner loop is for sub 7:00 pace so needless to say I wasn’t there. They have things calculated out and I did a 10 mile run in 1:28:11 for an 8:49 pace. Not too bad. First 4 miles (10 laps is ~4 miles) was a 35:55 split, then I did 2 mile splits 17:39 (8:49), 17:27 (8:43), 17:09 (8:34). For pace I’m training for (8:00) I should be running the first half of a long run at 9:36 (MP + 20%) and second half 8:48 (MP + 10%) according to Pfitz…I guess I was a little off on that last night but that’s OK. It was a shorter longer run anyway. And I just wanted to see that I could still run easy runs at around the 8:45-8:50 pace I had been doing. My hamstring is still a little sore and/or tight, when I stretch I definitely know it’s there, but it wasn’t bothering me on the run at all. My left knee was a bit sore after the run but was fine by the time I got home. I should’ve still iced it just to be safe, but I know the soreness came from the surface. I don’t think I’d do more than 10 on that surface, it is concrete, think any stadium you’ve ever been in…it’s great for those rollerblading down below though.

Anyway, I got home and was wiped. Watched TV and then went to bed, although a bit later than normal and I had a rough nights sleep. I woke up around 2:30 and was still awake around 3:30-4 and might have even been awake from 12:30 but can’t be 100% sure on that. I’m not tired today, but I just couldn’t sleep and if I had realized I was that awake I might have just gotten up and read for a while or something. On the plus side, the cold definitely seems to be on the downswing. I was sleeping fine, nothing draining, didn’t have to stay on my back propped up to be able to breath, but I am sneezing again today, which seems to be something to do with the work air anyway, I wish I had taken something before coming in, but oh well. I’ve been trying to avoid that anyway. I plan to run a recovery type 4 tonight even though it’s going to be cold, and then get another 6 miler at some point over the weekend, even though we are supposed to see nothing about 0 and negatives in the teens…I might have to find indoor running somewhere, but most likely I’ll just suck it up and brave it. As of right now, no real plans for the weekend. I’d really like to go out tonight but as cold as it’s going to be I don’t know if I’ll feel brave enough. Not even sure I’ll be going anywhere or doing anything for Super Bowl and that really sucks. I’d like to at least go meet up with people at a bar or something.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

I feel Guilty

I called in sick to work last night. Legitimately I was (am) sick…but still feel the guilt…but why should I? It’s not like I called in sick to go watch a band play (I might have done that before), or to just go for a workout (I might have done that before too). In fact I got home, I ate some crap (ie half a box or more of Lucky Charms and a cup or two of Edy’s Vanilla Bean ice cream) watched Wedding Crashers and then crawled into bed, where I actually went to sleep around 8:30, but was awake off and on through the night CAUSE I CAN’T BREATH!!! OK, so maybe I should break down and take something, but I so don’t want to. I suck on Zinc (Target brand Cold-eze) lozenges, alternating with Halls Defense Vitamin C with Zinc and Ecanacia (sp) every 3-4 hours. Last night I took some Airbourne Nighttime that is new to the market (so not liking the hot apple cider flavor, I much prefer the orange, but this supposedly had other things in it as well) but I thought the hot might help. I think tonight I’m going to dig out my vaporizer and put some Vicks into it, if I can find it that is, so maybe it will loosen stuff up. I just hate that I’m sneezing so much…colds suck. And I feel like such a baby. The only time I felt good yesterday, amazingly enough, was when I was down using the elliptical trainer and strength training. I told my boss I wanted to move my computer down to the fitness center so I could work while I was working out…Of course I don’t have a laptop so that is difficult…Anyway, today I elliptical trained at lunch again, since I’m not strength training today I did a 45 minute session instead of the 30 I usually do, then I’m going to Dome run tonight. Get in out of the cold (right now it’s 4) and get my longer run of the week, probably 10 miles, being in the cold, with a cold, probably not the best of ideas…I might even go use something indoors over the weekend since it’s going to be very, very cold this weekend, but we’ll see. If nothing else maybe I’ll sweat and run this cold out of me….It did take a lot of strength of will to NOT run last night since I wasn’t working (I had planned on intentionally not running yesterday since I knew I would be working last night and wouldn’t have time) and it was 17 out…yeah, a heat wave, in fact it had snow flurries I really wanted to run in at lunch, but I didn’t have outdoor stuff with me, so I didn’t…This is sad, even though I am not getting what I feel are quality runs, cause they are slow, I still want to run…and most times they are feeling so hard (again, could be because of the cold coming on). I know Dori commented that an old coach of hers suggested we do run slower in the cold, that could be true, I was going to say I had heard otherwise, but then realized that no, what I had heard otherwise was that we burn more calories in the cold, we actually don’t (darnit anyway) but it is a nice thought isn’t it??? I would so be doing more cold running if I thought it would burn more calories!!